Typical Tuesday

So....this week is a reminder of how my life normally is...incredibly chaotic LOL I've been having a nice few weeks so I had forgotten how crazy these kids can be! The day started off some what ok... the usual craziness of everyone waking up, changing diapers, making breakfast, and of course in the midst of bickering and yelling,along with the added task of giving Hayden a breathing treatment. Then my poor mom called and needed me to come help because she locked her keys in the van, so thanks to my oh so wonderful friend Glory who came and watched the kids for me, i was able to go help her. When i get back from that, it was about 10:15 and I hadn't eaten breakfast yet, so I started making my food and Jonas comes into the kitchen and says in his extra whiney voice, "what are you dooooooing?!" Me: "im making my breakfast, I havent eaten yet." Jonas: "BUT I ALREADY AAAAAATE!" Me: "Yes i know honey, this is mine." Jonas: "But I waaaaaant sooooome." LOL this is a glimpse of his mood today, hes just coming back from being sick all last week so hes of course not himself, i can relate for sure!! ;) We then ATTEMPT to move onto pre-school... HA...HA... I sit them down and try to review a few things from the past two weeks... I got a blank stare from D.J. who has this amazing ability to zone out and fall into a daze whenever I am talking...Jonas started whining saying he didnt want to do any school, and Kyleigh kept trying to feed Maxwell his snack (because Kyleigh thinks she is in fact the mother in this house). An attempt at reading our Bible story led to me telling Kyleigh and Jonas to stop laying down, and D.J. was scooting around the room while Maxwell attempted to hit him with his snack container, and then Jonas decides to dig into his little nose and wipes it on the rug. Gotta love their hospitality at this age, right? LOL  Then comes in my other sick child, Landon, who has now picked up a nice cold himself. He drags his little feet across the floor, crying the whole way ( sounding like a seal every time he Letters for the boys, and words for kyleigh. This didn't last long, once they started getting to the ones they didnt know, and the marsh-mellows stopped coming, they were done showing any kind of effort. Then all of a sudden, Landon finds a water bottle, opens it, takes a sip, and poors the rest of it all over the rug. Pre-school was then over. I cleaned it up, then went to make lunch. They all of course came in the kitchen before i was finished getting their food ready but i let them have what was ready and said, " im not done yet so dont start asking me for anything." as soon as the words leave my mouth, D.J. "Can i have some juice please?" Jonas " I need a fork" Landon: "uuuuuuh uuuuuuuh!!" (translation - "JUICE!") <sigh> Onward we go.  Then its time to clean up before nap... it only took me telling them about 10 times, but eventually the rooms were cleaned up. During that time, i took Maxwell downstairs to put him to sleep, lay him in the bed, go to get the fan and come back to find he had screamed so hard he thew up. So i cleaned that up, went back upstairs, and spent the next 20 minutes trying to get the VERY WIRED kiddos to go to sleep. D.J. "I need to go potty." Then "I need a drink" Then"I need my pillow and blanket from downstairs." Then Kyleigh asks if she can make her bed on the floor with Jonas, I said not today which led to her crying hysterically. The kids finally went down, (so i thought), only for Hayden to then wake up. So, fed her, changed her, did her breathing treatment, cleaned out her nose and put her back in bed ( shes still very sick :( ) only to have Maxwell start screaming bloody murder downstairs again. Then i go to start on the laundry, open up the washer and find that one of the things i washed had ripped open and their was stuffing all over the washer and every piece of clothing in it. (its gonna be fun to clean that up! :) ) So, here i sit...drinking my much needed cup of coffee, listening to my boys jumping up and down in their beds ( because they never went to sleep) Maxwells making his way around the house and doing what he and Landon do best, touching whatever they shouldnt LOL and I'm preparing for the second half of the day... Hope everyone is having a wonderful day so far, i'm going to block out the fact that its only Tuesday!! lol

Failure by choice

I have been in such a slump since I had Hayden. For the life of me I cannot seem to get a consistent routine down that allows me to accomplish all that needs to be done. I have so many ideas, so many chores, and so many kids that I just can't seem to get it all in no matter what I do! I had a friend ask recently how some of us fit it all in, and i responded with "I gave up and accepted that I never will until my kids are independent!" Its so frustrating though, because i look at the house and think "YUCK" and "FAIL", I see the kids and know that this time is precious and I need to utilize it so they will be trained "right" in the Lord. I want routine, I want to have devotion time with them, I want chore charts, I want quality time with each one, etc..etc...etc... but before I know it, the day is always over and I'm rushing to get them to bed so i can hit the sheets myself! I have friends whose homes are immaculate, and i think "how?? how do you do this?? what is wrong with me!" Or when my parents tell me about families at their church with stair step children who will sit quietly through an entire church service...seriously? my kids? yeah, that would last about 5 minutes. Its exhausting... and with a very disciplined type A personality, its nearly impossible for me to accept defeat in anything. If i want something done, I do it, its how I've always been. But these past few months I've found myself doing one of the things that frustrates me the most, making plans and failing to follow through with them. Its exhausting trying to get it all in, to be the "perfect" parent and wife, to keep the "perfect" home, to be the "best" friend to everyone... not only is that impossible no matter your situation or who you are, but I feel like Solomon's analogy applies in that its like "chasing after the wind." Its just NOT going to happen. So today...I surrender God. I'm pretty sure that's all you've wanted me to to do anyways isn't it? I, especially out of my own power, will not accomplish all i want and need to do today, or tomorrow, or ever. For you Mama's out there who seem to have it all together... I admire you, but I cannot compete. I give this day, and those that follow to God, and whatever He will have me accomplish with each breath He allows me to breathe, that will be sufficient for me. I'm throwing in the towel... so when you come to my house and see my piles of laundry, or dishes, or the dust one my ceiling fans, or better yet, if my children are pulling each other's hair out, screaming, throwing tantrums or breaking something...know that I am admittedly a failure...and I have no shame. ;)